I understand that there are some problems
Am I not too blind to know?
All the pain you kept inside you
Even though you might not show
If I can apologize for being wrong
Then it's just a shame on me
I'll be the reason for your pain
& you can put the blame on me

It's only Monday, & already, I'm drained of all my energy.
I haven't felt so tired, mentally, emotionally, & physically, for so long.

So much have been going on, I really wonder if I'll be able to deal.
It's ironic, how I've always been so sure that I'll be able to take whatever life throws at me, but now I'm defeated, & all alone.

I promise I felt really really mad at what had happened today, no matter how hard I try, I can never tolerate seeing my friends & the people that I care about stuck in that kind of situation & if it wasn't for Fiona, I would've done something reckless with the umbrella (ella ella, eh eh eh) I had snatched from, you know who you are.

& look at what Gabby said,

life is so boring .................i love u says:
heng ______ 2day not there
life is so boring .................i love u says:
or not got show watch already
life is so boring .................i love u says:
girl with umbrella vs boys

Ahem, had to censor off my reply & some name, y'know /:

& ZhenHao must've been really mad just now, because he roared at me $#%&;!?^@!!!!!!!
No, I'm not exaggerating it AT ALL & yes he Roared.

Right now, I'm just sort of relieved that everything on their side seems to be ok...
(I'm starting to lie to myself, damn Gabby!)

& as though all of that wasn't enough, today I had to even chase off some really, annoying assholes.

I've been putting up with all these nonsense from you for quite some time now, & I'm sure that you know.
I don't need you to take all of my problems into your hands, & from the very beginning I thought I had made myself very clear that since all of this had started from me, I'll take matters in my own hands.
Untill now I still don't see why you had to interfere, & sure, I may not have a single clue on how I'll cope, but all that you've done made things really difficult for me.
I know you care & that you're trying to help, but you know, I really won't mind clearing up the misunderstanding with, whoever, just on my own.
Plenty has been going on, so much that it's really starting to exhaust me, but all I'm asking for, is for you to leave, my friends, alone.

You know who you are, & believe me, the next time round, I may not even consider the fact that we've been friends for so long.

Today, I finally found the courage to talk about what had happened in the past with Fiona, & I promise just thinking about it was enough to push me close to breaking point.

7 years have already passed.
None of us have ever talked about it, & I've always been running away from it, but I guess it's time to face up to reality.

The feeling sucks, & I am not afraid to admit that, I really am afraid.